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added 73 characters in body
Robin Ryder
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Shakespeare Programming Language, 204 156 bytes

-48 bytes thanks to Jo King (mostly by changing the output method)

A.Ajax,.Puck,.Act I:.Scene I:.[Exeunt][Enter Ajax and Puck]Ajax:Open mind.Puck:Open mind.Is I worse zero?If soSpeak thy.Is you as big as I?If soLet usAct I. 

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Exits with error if the input is double speak, and with warning if it is not double speak (which is allowed by default).

Robin Ryder
  • 15.8k
  • 2
  • 25
  • 71