An update for version 13.3; assuming you have already copied your ssh id to the server (if not look e.g. here)
LaunchKernels["ssh://youruser@server_ip//opt/Wolfram/WolframEngine/13.3/Executables/wolfram?2"]; ParallelEvaluate[$MachineName] CloseKernels[]; Where /opt/Wolfram/WolframEngine/13.3/Executables/wolfram is the full path of the location of wolfram binary
And the ?2 indicate to launch two kernels