First, here's how the documentation expects you to create references for automatic numbering. Let's create some cells with automatic numbering, and give each cell a cell tag option:
SeedRandom[1] CellPrint /@ Table[Cell[w, "DisplayFormulaNumbered", CellTags->w], {w, RandomWord[5]}];

Now, to create a reference to the "hurtle" formula, you would use the menu item Insert | Automatic Numbering ..., which opens up the following dialog:

Change the Counter to "DisplayFormulaNumbered" and select "hurtle", and a reference to the "hurtle" cell will be created.
Lucas provided a palette to streamline this, by making it easier to find the cell reference (and by automatically creating a randomized cell tag if needed). Instead, it is also possible to copy the cell reference by modifying the style sheet. For instance:
Module[{event, label}, event = "MouseClicked" :> CopyToClipboard @ Cell @ TextData[{ CounterBox[ "DisplayFormulaNumbered", Replace[CurrentValue[ParentCell @ ParentCell @ EvaluationCell[], CellTags], l_List :> First@l] ] }]; label = Cell[ TextData[{ "(", Cell @ BoxData @ TagBox[ CounterBox["DisplayFormulaNumbered"], EventHandlerTag[{event}] ], ")" }], "DisplayFormulaEquationNumber" ]; SetOptions[ EvaluationNotebook[], StyleDefinitions -> Notebook[ { Cell[StyleData[StyleDefinitions->"Default.nb"]], Cell[StyleData["DisplayFormulaNumbered"], CellFrameLabels -> {{None, label}, {None, None}} ] }, StyleDefinitions->"PrivateStylesheetFormatting.nb" ] ] ]
The stylesheet works by including an event handler that copies the cell reference to the clipboard when clicked. Inside of a CellFrameLabels option, the EvaluationCell[] refers to the Cell @ BoxData @ TagBox[_CounterBox, _EventHandler] cell. The parent cell of that evaluation cell is the Cell[TextData[{"(", .., ")"}], "DisplayFormulaEquationNumber"] cell, and the parent cell of that cell is the main cell, which should have the CellTags option set. Here's a short animation of the stylesheet in action:

Now, suppose the formula to be referenced is far away, and you don't want to look for it in order to click on it? In that case, it would be convenient if there were a short cut to bring up the menu of relevant cell tags to use. Here is an input alias that does this:
CurrentValue[EvaluationNotebook[], {InputAliases, "dfn"}] = DynamicBox[ ToBoxes[ ActionMenu[ "tags", With[{tags = CurrentValue[Cells[CellStyle->"DisplayFormulaNumbered"], CellTags]}, #:>NotebookWrite[ ParentBox@EvaluationBox[], CounterBox["DisplayFormulaNumbered", #] ]& /@ tags ] ] ] ];
Here is an animation of the input alias in action:

Finally, if the cell tags were randomized UUID strings (as in Lucas' answer), the input alias wouldn't be very useful, which is why I recommend assigning meaningful cell tags to your formula cells, as meaningful cell tags are needed when trying to select the right cell tag from a list of cell tags.