but I just cannot get them to combine to find the background-red ANSI escape sequence ^[41m
If you use vim to open this file, you will know it's not ^[41m, instead it's ^[[41m, which ^[ navigate by arrow key as a set:

1b is Escape represent by single escape character ^[ which can be invoked by Ctrl+V follow by Esc. ^[ look like 2 characters but it's not, it's single:
xb@dnxb:~/Downloads/grep$ ascii 1b ASCII 1/11 is decimal 027, hex 1b, octal 033, bits 00011011: called ^[, ESC Official name: Escape xb@dnxb:~/Downloads/grep$
Do this (Use Ctrl+V follow by Esc to create ^[, then continuously type \[41m):
xb@dnxb:~/Downloads/grep$ hexdump -C /tmp/2 00000000 1b 5b 33 37 6d 1b 5b 34 31 6d 30 2e 30 30 25 0a |.[37m.[41m0.00%.| 00000010 xb@dnxb:~/Downloads/grep$ \grep '^[\[41m' /tmp/2 0.00% xb@dnxb:~/Downloads/grep$ \grep '^[\[41m' /tmp/2 | hexdump -C 00000000 1b 5b 33 37 6d 1b 5b 34 31 6d 30 2e 30 30 25 0a |.[37m.[41m0.00%.| 00000010 xb@dnxb:~/Downloads/grep$
Ensure you escape grep by prefix \ to avoid its alias --color affect:

[Alternative]:
\grep -P '\e\[41m' (Credit: OP's comment) \grep '^[\[41m' , which use Ctrl+V follow by Ctrl+[ to create ^[. Useful when backspace in my keyboard is not 0x08, but i can use Ctrl+V follow by Ctrl+H (^H get from ascii 08) to produce it.
\grep '\^\[41m'?^[41mcontent of the target file ? Usehexdump -C <filename>. I have no problem to grep it with GNU grep 2.16.